Switching Gears

Out of sight....
Out of mind.....
Out of time.....
Life spinning counterclockwise.....
Listening to words from the wise.....
A reality I soon despise...
Give it time......
Tick....tock......
Seconds ticking off that clock.
Driving down that highway.....
As if I'm switching gears..
Between...remorse....pain....bitterness....and my deepest fears....
Now I'm made to look like a fricking deadbeat.....
Crushes my soul like a brutal defeat...
Can't even hold my head high.....
Pain so grave....sometimes I wish I'd die.....
Kick those foolish thoughts to the side...
Swallow that ugly pride.........
Find myself coasting on memory lane....
Way before the pain......
Better ways...
Better days....
Loved you so deeply.....
Ain't gonna lie.......still do...deeply
Steady weeping.....
Wake up in tears while sleeping...
Can't comprehend it.....
This is how you want to end it?
Screw me and what I'm feeling...
They say time leads to healing
Of all wounds.......so I lift my eyes to the ceiling....
I pray....I pray....oh how I pray...........
Each and every day....
That He put my mind at ease....
That these
Crazy thoughts
How I've fought
So long...so hard...secrets I've kept for so long....
Grudges against those I felt did me wrong....
A lot won't overstand what I'm saying...
With matters of the heart...trust me I'm not playing...
I gotta cleanse my soul.....#imjustsaying

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